First date advice

No matter how long you’ve been active in the dating scene, meeting someone new for the first time can always be nerve racking. Whether its your first ever time going on a date, or your hundredth, don’t let the jitters ruin your fun! Remember that it’s normal to be nervous for a first date with a new person, or even for the first few dates, and also that your date is probably feeling the same way. Though there is no perfect formula for a successful first date, taking a few deep breaths, allowing for some mental preparation, and scanning the following first date advice tips can help to ease your mind and pave the way for a great time, regardless of your experience or individual interests.

 

Be ready early

Be sure to give yourself plenty of time to get ready before meeting up with your date. Preparation should be relaxing and exciting, not stressful. Scrambling to get dressed just before a nice dinner or coffee plans will give you little time to calm any anxious nerves, and will more than likely make you even more apprehensive, especially if you tend to primp on the way out. When gearing up for your first date, play some upbeat tunes and leisurely take a nice warm shower before picking out clothes that make you feel confident and comfortable. Time and preparation allow you to mentally prepare for a date, rather than rushing into it and arriving frazzled. I often find that, with practice, preparing for a date becomes a sort of calming ritual, which is how it should be! Get in your zone and get ready to have fun! Being ready early and continuing to listen to music or reading a book before taking off can also help to create a smooth first meet up for both you and the other person.

 

Be Yourself

Though somewhat cliché, this is by far the most important piece of advice. Not only is it important for your own wellbeing, but also, putting on any sort of façade means risking an incompatible relationship in the future. Of course, different women pursue different types of connections. But, if your aim is to develop an honest long-term relationship, pretending to be different than you really are only hinders the development of such a goal. Anyone who doesn’t enjoy you for who you are isn’t worth another date, so stay true to yourself and don’t give it a second thought! We can only hope your date will do the same. Finding a genuine match and being confident in yourself is more fulfilling than building something on false interests and waiting for it to crumble.

 

Be Clear

As mentioned in the article, “How to Talk to Guys,” being clear with your date is important. Not only should you let him know if you are uncomfortable for any reason, but you should also be clear about your intentions. This will benefit the both of you. If you had a great time, don’t be afraid to let him know! By the same token, be honest if you just don’t think it will work out and don’t want to go on another date. This isn’t entirely your responsibility, as he should be honest with you as well. However, I can guarantee you will feel better in the long run if you are honest with both yourself and your date. Either thank him for a lovely evening and let him down easy, or tell him that you would really like to see him again, and rest easy knowing your interactions won’t turn into an unclear mess. Not every single first date will work out, but if it does, make the process of setting up a second date easier for the both of you, and be straightforward about your feelings!

 

Be Positive

Beginning a date with a great attitude can make all the difference, even if you find that the two of you aren’t perfectly compatible. It will lift your spirits, calm your nerves, and even put your date at ease if you exude excitement and happiness. It doesn’t matter if you end up going on a second date or not! All that matters is that you remain positive about the situation and go in with an open mind. No matter what happens, at least you will enjoy yourself!

 

Don’t expect perfection

Though it is perfectly ok to have high standards, as everyone deserves a compatible and respectful partner, it can be harmful to attend a date with a checklist of expectations. Television and movies have brainwashed us into thinking that our love lives will only be perfect fairytales. Though love is attainable and you will truly have some wonderful times with future partners, if you get together expecting a date to be exactly as you imagined, or for a prince charming to sweep you off of your feet, chances are you wont have much luck. Be open-minded and see what happens! Some of the best experiences in life are the unexpected ones, so it’s important not to limit opportunities.

 

Don’t give up

The previous paragraphs aren’t meant to sound negative in any way. What I’m trying to express most clearly is that not every single date will work out. It won’t be any fault of your own, so always remember not to give up. Though you can study up all you want and gain practiced dating skills, the most important part of the entire date is compatibility. It is absolutely impossible to force a relationship, and compatibility is not human error, but a totally uncontrollable fact of life. So, avoid passing judgment on yourself or the other person if things don’t work out, and look forward to the dates that will evolve into something more. It will happen, even if not right away. Who knows? Maybe some of you are getting ready to go on a first date with a man who ends up being your soul mate. But if not, don’t let it get you down. Just keep looking, and have fun with those you meet on the way.

Sign up to one of our e-books below to propel your success with men, make sure to read one of our other articles or share this article in social media.