We humans are so eager to please aren’t we? We are constantly trying to figure out what other people want, so that they can give us what we want. Put simply, we all really just want love and connection. However, being that we are all individuals, it can get confusing trying to pinpoint what each person wants. No matter; there are some things that stay relatively universal. Also, if you’ve ever wanted to just shout up to the sky “What do men want?” and have real men actually answer back to you, well you’re in luck. These are answers that came from living, breathing, everyday men. We hope it is insightful and goes a long way toward understanding men and what men want.
“Tolerate” their Hobbies
It is interesting to note that this response is rather common. Perhaps far too many men have had that girlfriend that would scold them for the things they enjoyed. Think about it for a moment. Say you love playing an instrument. It fills you with glee and delight when you get the notes just right. You find yourself enraptured by this melody unfolding from your fingertips. Then, when you’re in the midst of enjoying your own existence, the person you thought loved you comes in and says how “unproductive” this hobby is. Or they say that it is boring. Or they show next to no interest in this wonderful thing you love. So, after mulling over this, it should come as no surprise that men just want someone who will let them love what they love. They want someone to let them have their time to explore their interests and passions. Of course, bonus points if you enjoy that thing too. But if you don’t, it is simple enough to understand the happiness it brings to him and to let that be. Do not threaten it or ask him to sacrifice it. If you want to progress in understanding men, actually ask him why he loves it.
Ride or Die
So this is sort of a slang term that speaks of a woman who will support her man and his lifestyle, regardless of the harm it might bring her. That’s a bit extreme. The Twilight franchise set horrible standards for women, rather by way of glorifying unhealthy relationships. But the concept of self sacrifice isn’t extreme. What men want is a woman who will be his biggest supporter through the times that are very stifling and difficult. Life is hard enough without you being hard on him. He wants to know that he has your respect and support. And let’s be honest, this can involve some sacrifice on our part, either of time or emotions, because it’s not always easy to cheer others on.
What Men Want is a Woman who still wants to Date Them
This is quote, unquote, what a male friend said. “After a while in a relationship, people sometimes shift their focus elsewhere, be it family, career, their personal interests, or whatever else. Please be the kind of girl that, after all that, still totally wants to dress up and go out with us from time to time.” So you see men don’t want the romance to fizzle either just because the two of you got comfortable. They want women who will still be young at heart with them and treat them like they did when they were first infatuated with them.
This one is becoming more in demand these days. It is an interesting change from the typical gender roles of old. Women were expected to be submissive and didn’t hold much power. As a result, they were indeed needier. But since women have more capacity to contribute in this society, they are expected to be a bit less needy as a result as well. An article in Scientific American shows us another transformation of old gender roles. As women become less submissive, it turns out that men are actually attracted to women who don’t conform as a whole. It was thought that women were the only gender who experienced “bad boy phases”. Not that being a nonconformist really makes you a “bad person”. But perhaps it does inspire a little bit of edge. And men respond positively to it. So, in summary, men want independent women that are also independent thinkers. But perhaps not so independent that they can’t provide anything for you. Men still want to give. In other words, you’re not required to be a woman of steel. But it is appreciated when you have a good head on your shoulders and can take care of yourself.
What Men Want is a Woman Interested in Giving, not just taking
This certainly applies to pretty much everyone. It’s not strictly true for men. It is also true for women, gay, straight, or bisexual. Our relationships should be a glorious mutual exchange. Too much taking becomes pretty much a literal drain on our emotions. To be a joyful giver is to be a good boyfriend or girlfriend or spouse. Relationships are going to ask a lot of you. So it is important that you already enjoy the act of giving, beforehand.
It’s all pretty simple if you understand or have a grip on human psychology. What do we want? What do you want? We mostly want respect, appreciation, validation, and people that don’t overly exhaust us. That’s mostly it. All of these tips are merely different venues through which to give these much needed emotional human necessities the growth they need.
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